Practicing Speech and Speaking of Religion in Our House

Gbot: “Now I have all my cards, so I am ready to go.” Mbot: “Now we are pretty like you, Mom.”

I’m thinking that if our revolutionary brothers had just broken into the queen’s powder room and stolen her lipstick and credit cards two hundred and forty-four years ago, she might have laughed and said, “You go, boys.” Of course, her credit limit was substantially higher than mine, so maybe not.

Due to things like pinatas (Mbot’s) and death (Nora’s), I’ve been neglecting to share stories of daily life and conversations in our household. And so, in celebration of American Independence, I will briefly wallow here in the splendor of the rights provided by Amendment One of the Constitution of the United States as practiced in our house. (If you need a refresher, here it is: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

In our household, although I wish we assembled peacefully more often, and although often a redress of grievances results in a time out anyway, we take full advantage of our other rights. On Sunday, Mbot asked, about Nora Ephron, “Does she have a ladder so she can climb down from Heaven?”

I was able to reply, without breaking any laws: “Moon Pie, every essay she wrote and movie she made is a rung in that ladder.”

And this morning, from the breakfast table:

Mbot: “I’m NOT going to marry you, Gbot.”

Gbot: “But you HAVE to marry me.”

Mbot: “I’m not going to. I’m going to marry Ybot.”

Although it’s still illegal–in the U.S. for one good reason, in the state of Arizona for one bad reason–at least they won’t get thrown in the stocks for talking about it.

Later,  when I told Mbot we WERE going to the Y, whether he wanted to or not: “You’re a bad mommy. I don’t like you.”

Instead of getting tossed in the dungeon, he got a hug. Although we went to the Y anyway.

I do admit to cronyism with my biggest corporate affiliate (Husbot), and I know I get it wrong sometimes. But I’d like to think I’m a kind and benevolent dictator with the best interests of my subjects at the fore. The U.S. government gets a LOT wrong. (Don’t get me started. There is a reason this is a mommyblog, not a political blog.) But it gets a lot right, too.

Here’s to US.

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